Day One: Mission Statement

Welcome to my blog.

For a long time I thought a blog authored by me would be an entirely worthless endeavor because I had nothing to say that anyone wanted to hear.  When I published my book, however, I realized that there are some things that I do want others to hear or read, and that it’s my duty as an idiot to bring those things to captivated audiences.

Because I spent approximately 2 semesters in a science class (or was it math?) where I learned about the scientific method (or was it algebraic meth-heads?) I feel the need to state my porpoise:

  • Firstly, this blog is meant to entertain you.  Internet entertainment is a billion-dollar industry, and I want in on the action.  Of course, I’m almost positive 99% of that billion is made from fetish porno, but nevertheless, I will assume the role of a meek, country lawyer and take on the tobacco-industry stand-in of the hour: porno.  (Someone write that down as a potential fetish porno theme: meek country lawyer vs. tobacco-industry stand-in.)
  • B: I will contribute writing tips/advice to the world of writers laboring away in an ever-increasing swamp of new indie titles.  I have a good deal of formal (read: useless) creative-writing training, and I want to pass it along.  My posts will attempt to bolster your writing abilities so that you might rise from the depths and dominate all who venture near the Amazonian swamp.  (Someone write that plot down.  We’ll call it Swamp Thing.)
  • And #3, I’m going to relate the hilariously pathetic stories from my life that I wouldn’t dare tell anyone face to face.

I hope you’ll visit often if only to laugh at me.


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